Expect to Be Unable to Poop

Everybody poops. That is, everybody except pregnant women.

Last Friday when I spent my 30-minute drive home in excruciating back pain I was sure that my kidneys had decided that they were vetoing the pregnancy and taking a leave of absence. My doctor's office had closed by the time I got home and I decided to wait it out for a bit to ensure that the pain wasn't related to digestive problems (which had been happening on and off for a bit). Sure enough, the pain had subsided by Saturday morning so I figured my problems were over.

Where's reality to slap you when you need it most?

The pain was not over, oh no. Tuesday brought on a whole new day of abdominal/back pain and this time I DID go to the doc.

Her recommendation? Laxatives.

You know what? Laxative is a funny word. So is constipation. I usually laugh at bathroom humor like this. But guess who wasn't laughing when she was comparing a name brand laxative with a store brand? This girl. (I went with the store brand in case you were wondering).

My doc suggested getting a suppository because they were fast-acting.

Over my constipated, dead body!

I doubt I'll have any dignity once this baby is pushed out my vag-jay-jay, but I'll be damned it I have to lube up a pill to shove it where the sun doesn't shine just for a little abdominal relief.

I went with the oral powder, thanyouverymuch. And now I can poop again.

Little victories.