Wednesday, January 30, 2013

Expect to Be Unable to Poop

Everybody poops. That is, everybody except pregnant women.

Last Friday when I spent my 30-minute drive home in excruciating back pain I was sure that my kidneys had decided that they were vetoing the pregnancy and taking a leave of absence. My doctor's office had closed by the time I got home and I decided to wait it out for a bit to ensure that the pain wasn't related to digestive problems (which had been happening on and off for a bit). Sure enough, the pain had subsided by Saturday morning so I figured my problems were over.

Where's reality to slap you when you need it most?

The pain was not over, oh no. Tuesday brought on a whole new day of abdominal/back pain and this time I DID go to the doc.

Her recommendation? Laxatives.

You know what? Laxative is a funny word. So is constipation. I usually laugh at bathroom humor like this. But guess who wasn't laughing when she was comparing a name brand laxative with a store brand? This girl. (I went with the store brand in case you were wondering).

My doc suggested getting a suppository because they were fast-acting.

Over my constipated, dead body!

I doubt I'll have any dignity once this baby is pushed out my vag-jay-jay, but I'll be damned it I have to lube up a pill to shove it where the sun doesn't shine just for a little abdominal relief.

I went with the oral powder, thanyouverymuch. And now I can poop again.

Little victories.

1 comment:

  1. This may be tmi, but I'm gonna go there anyway. If you think it's bad now, wait til after labor. You're gonna be done pushing, and you're REALLY not gonna want to poop. I didn't have a bowel movement for a WEEK after my baby was born. when I did, I swear it hurt worse than labor. I screamed more during that than I did during the delivery. and I'm not exaggerating. I should have given it a name too.